Tuesday, June 29, 2010

Yep, it's been awhile....

Really I had all but given up on this blog...I started homeschooling the boy back in January and I have had little to no time to even think about writing anything here......or doing much of anything else for that matter. But I do miss it. Many times I feel like I have a few things to say, but if I don't have a pretty picture to add I just don't bother.....or like right now I decide to sit down a write and 5 bombs go off in the house distracting my already scattered mind and requiring my immediate attention.

We have been on a never ending roller coaster of determining our ultimate family plan just because I want to do some landscaping......

Me: "I want to plant some crape myrtles in the yard."
R: "Well, no we might get a pool and then have to dig them up..... if we get a pool.."
Me: "I really want a pool, let's get a pool!"
R: "Should we get a pool? Is our yard big enough for a pool? We need to just sell this house and buy a new bigger house....Can we afford that?"

Usually I just say no, that is not a good idea and the conversation starts anew in about a month, but this last time I said "Sure, what the hay....let's do it!"

Truthfully all I really want are some crape myrtles and a pool, but it seems we get mired down in this whole house debate every time. A few weeks ago we started full steam ahead on the "sell this house" path which meant major cleaning, painting and decluttering that lead to a storage unit...that is now full of lots of junk and a some random toys that I was sure no one would miss. Of course those are the ones they are now looking for... We just don't have room for all this stuff in our house, but after a more in depth study of our budget we have found that our previous notion of "Oh yea, sure we can swing a few more hundred $ a month in mortgage payment" may not be the smartest idea. This point was punctuated by my sudden toothache followed by the first trip to get one of 2 required root canals today. HELLO UNEXPECTED BILL.... That will run us about $1200 once all is said and done... Yea for our awesome insurance but still $1200 is a blow to the ol checking account, kinda like the 16 shots they gave me today were a blow to the ol mouth.

(Number of times small people have called "Mommy...." while writing this....about 31.......)

Sewing has come to a halt....I just don't have time and am not sure how i ever did. I am hoping to get back to my machine and clear out some fabric soon, but with all this painting, cleaning and child maintenance, I am not sure when that is going to happen....

OK now on to more important things...the homeschooling...schooling the boy has been both the most rewarding and most stressful thing I have ever done. I know without a doubt that it is what God has called me to do. For years he has been whispering to me and nudging me in this direction, and finally I stopped listening to all the self doubt and all the "experts" who told me you cannot homeschool a child with autism. My poor child was in 2nd grade and falling farther and father behind because his sensory issues made it impossible for him to focus on anything in a small crowded classroom of 32 wiggly, noisy bodies. He was so stressed about school and would cry getting ready for school every morning, refuse to eat any breakfast, sit in a deafening cafeteria crying with his hands over his ears not eating any lunch, and would be crying when I picked him up everyday. He would do little if any work at school and the teachers had no way of making him. They tried reward charts, treats and even missing time at recess which was really more of a reward because he could finally get away from all the commotion. Eventually school being school, they would just move on to the next activity whether he had finished or even started the previous one or not. But really the worst part about it was that it was killing his little spirit...he was simply miserable...and he was ALONE....alone all day in a sea of noise that was just too much for little boy with autism to handle. The school's answer was to take him out of inclusion and put in into a self contained Special Ed classroom.....NO THANK YOU was my reply.